March 22, 1984
XXX Insurance Company
1252 - 6th Street
Hoboken, New Jersey 65656

Dear Sir:

I am writing in response to your request for additional information in
block #3 of the accident reporting form.  I put "Poor Planning" as the
cause of my accident.  You said in your letter that I should explain
more fully and I trust that the following details will be sufficient.

I am a bricklayer by trade.  On the day of the accident, I was working
alone on the roof of a new six story building.  When I completed my
work, I discovered that I had about 500 pounds of bricks left over.
Rather than carry the bricks down by hand, I decided to lower them in
a barrel by using a pulley which, fortunately, was attached to the side
of the building at the sixth floor.

Securing the rope at ground level, I went up to the roof, swung the
barrel out and loaded the bricks into it.  Then I went back to the
ground and untied the rope, holding it tightly to insure a slow
descent of the 500 pounds of bricks.  You will note in block #11 of
the accident reporting form that my weight is 135 pounds.

Due to my suprise at being jerked off the ground so suddenly, I lost
my presence of mind and forgot to let go of the rope.  Needless to
say, I proceeded at a rather rapid rate up the side of the building.

In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel, which was now
proceeding in a downward direction at an equally impressive rate of
speed.  This explains the fractured skull, minor abrasions and broken
collar bone, as listed in section III of the accident reporting form.

Slowed only slightly, I continued my rapid ascent, not stopping until
the fingers of my right hand were two knuckles deep into the pulley,
which I noted in paragraph #2 of this correspondence.

Fortunately, by this time, I had regained my presence of mind and was
able to hold tightly to the rope, despite the excruciating pain I was
now beginning to experience.

At approximately the same time, however, the barrel of bricks hit the
ground...and the bottom fell out of the barrel.  Now, devoid of the
weight of the bricks, the barrel now weighed approximately 50 pounds.

I refer you again to my weight in block #11.  As you might imagine, I
began a rapid descent down the side of the building.

In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel coming up.  This
accounts for the two fractured ankles, broken tooth, and severe
lacerations of my legs and lower body.

Here my luck begain to change slightly.  The encounter with the barrel
seemed to slow it up enough to lessen my injuries when I fell into the
bricks.  Fortunately, only three vertebrae were cracked.

I am sorry to report, however, that as I lay there on the pile of
bricks in pain, unable to move and watching the empty barrel six
stories above me, I once again lost my composure and presence of mind
and let go of the rope.

					Sincerely,

-- Author Unknown.

The Song that originated it:

"Why Paddy's not at work, today" 

Dear Boss, I write this note,
For to tell you of my plight.
And at the time of writing I am not a pretty sight.
My body is all black and blue,
My face a deathly grey,
And I write this note to say why Paddy's,
Not at work, today.

While working on the fourteenth floor, some bricks I had to clear.
For to throw them down from off the top,
Seemed quite a good idear *
But the foreman, he would not agree,
He being an awful sod,
He said I'd have to cart them down
A ladder, in my hod *

Well clearing all these bricks by hand seemed so very slow
So I hoisted up a barrel,
And secured the rope below.
But in my haste to do the job,
I was too blind to see,
That a barrelful of building bricks,
Is heavier than me.

So when I untied the rope, of course the barrel fell like lead.
And clinging tightly to the rope,
I started up instead.
I shot up like a rocket,
and to my dismay I found,
That halfway up, I met the bloody barrel,
Coming down.

Well, the barrel broke my shoulder as toward the ground it sped.
And when I reached the top, 
I banged the pulley with my head.
I clung on tight, now numb with shock,
From that almightly blow,
When the barrel spilled out half its bricks,
Some fourteen floors below.

Now when the bricks had fallen, from the barrel to the floor,
I now outweighed the barrel,
And started down once more.
Still clinging tightly to the rope,
I raced towards the ground.
And I landed on those broken bricks,
That lay scattered all around.

And as I lay there moaning, I'd thought I'd passed the worst.
But when the barrel hit the top,
Was then the bottom burst.
A shower of bricks rains down on me,
I didn't have a hope,
And in the great confusion,
I let go the bloody rope.

Well, the barrel now was heavier, and it started down once more.
And it landed right on top of me,
As I lay there on the floor,
It broke three ribs, and my left arm,
And I can only say,
That I hope you understand why
Paddy's not at work, today.